10 Things I learned in Brazil.

This seems a little more dramatic than it needs to be, as I was in Sao Paulo for one night only. And that is not a sold out Broadway show. Not yet anyhow.  It’s just me being wisk away across the Atlantic in a metal tube for one meeting and then flying back the next day.

But like anything in life there is always lessons to be learned.  Here goes.

  1. Your passport will be checked at least three times from the time you disembark up to an excluding customs. Maybe it’s my face. 
  2. No-one checked my yellow fever certificate which means my emcounter with a HUGE needle, in a smellly clinic, was all for nothing.
  3. Traffic is horrendous. People walk around with carts selling snacks, thus providing additonal things motorists have to avoid on a never moving freeway.
  4. Woman do not strut their stuff in g-strings like they do in all the travel brochures of Brazil. They do drive taxis though. But fully clothed.
  5. Public urination is frowned upon even though the canal smells like a urinal during the October fest. A cop will verbalise his disgust in Portuguese even if you have a medical condition and would die if you hold it for another second.
  6. People consume so much meat that if you dare to witness a full sitting, you are definately going to end up with a gout attack or something worse. It has to be a vegetarian’s worst nightmare.
  7. Some areas of the city has a putrid smell that can only be described as the underarm pit of a hoarder-cat-lady who belongs to a cult that considers personal hygiene a cardinal sin.
  8. Caparinho is a lemon-vodka based drink so sweet, it strips the fluoride from your teeth whilst attempting to finish it. It contains approximately 1,634,298 calories. Per sip.
  9. It takes a taxi one hour and forty five minutes to get from the hotel to the airport at the speed of a dying snail. I already mentioned the traffic didn’t I?
  10. And that’s all folks, it was a quick visit.

25 thoughts on “10 Things I learned in Brazil.

  1. Wat my van Sao Paulo getref het,is die enorme grootte van die stad.Soos mens bo-oor vlieg is dit ‘n betonoerwoud sonder grense of horison in sig!Definitief nie ‘n plek waar mens langer as 24 uur wil vertoef nie.😵😬

    Liked by 1 person

    • I’m not surprised at all. We went to a buffet dinner type joint and you have to indicate that your stuffed by flipping a red coaster on the table. If not they bombard you with a wide variety of meat. There was salad too but nobody bothered with that green stuff.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. You should not judge Brazil by going to only one city. And I am pretty sure you did not go even to all of Sao Paulo’s neighborhoods. I came to this blog hopping for a god post that would describe Brazil as it really is and I got really disappointed. Sure, Brazil has its flaws but there are a lot of cool, interesting things to do, and the best thing is the amazing culture. You should try going to Rio sometime, it is awesome.
    And, by the way. “caparinho” does not exist. It is called Caipirinha.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I must admit that this post was slightly misleading but hey, what can I say, I was only there for one day.

      And thanks a lot for the correction of caipirinha which my spell checker continously spit out as ‘can piranha…’

      Thanks for the comment.

      Liked by 1 person

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