It has to be the most common annoyance experienced by users of technology everywhere. As soon as you want to partake in the pleasures and treasures of modern comforts, a password is required. For every frigging thing.
A password is required if you want to buy stuff, read stuff, access stuff, post stuff, play stuff, write stuff, approve stuff, release stuff. A password is even required if you just want to retrieve your own goddamn stuff. You end up with a thousand different places where you need to type in those eight crucial characters.
The problem is an obvious one: What normal human being has the ability to remember all the different passwords that is required for daily functioning?
No one, I tell ya. Not one single person. (And Spock is not a person.)
The reality is that most people simply pick one. A password for everything. One word that rule them all. One that grants the user the ability to access everything about you. A whole Internet portfolio available if you know the crazy combination of the user. Allowing cyber criminals the opportunity, to not only hijack your credit card, but steal your blood and kidneys as well.
The second conundrum in selecting a password is finding something that you will remember tomorrow.
So it will most probably end up being something relatable. Something the user likes or dislikes. Maybe a favourite movie. Or band. And this proves that the spy movies are accurate. You know which ones I’m referring too? Those where the hacker sits and access a computer because he sees a painting in the study and types in the painter’s name that appears on the golden frame. And we think what poor sod would choose such an obvious, easy password? And we laugh at the ridiculousness of the scene. The absurdity of another Hollywood cop-out.
Well here’s my little secret. I’m very close to that sod. I am SO hackable. Hollywood might know something after all.
Anyhow, if I didn’t have a word to rule them all, then I’ll probably end up with this sequence next time I want to check my non-existing bank balance:
Please enter log in name:
pieterk
Your password has expired. Please enter new password:
thor
Your password requires a minimum of eight characters. Please try again:
thorshammer
Your password requires a capital letter. Please try again:
Thorshammer
Your password requires a numeric number. Please try again:
1 Thorshammer
Your password doesn’t allow spaces. Please try again:
1Thorshammer
Your password requires a symbol key. Please try again:
#1THORSHAMMER
Your password doesn’t allow subsequent capital letters. Please try again:
Take#1Thorshammerandshoveitupyourassandgivemefuckingaccess
That password is already in use. Please try again:
And I’m off to my happy place with my good friend Jack. (which I got on credit.)
I have a few passwords. One unique one for anything I actually care about, like my gmail, or paypal, or chase, or amazon…mostly things that involve money. And then I have a throwaway password for EVERYTHING ELSE. It’s been very useful to go back to a site I hadn’t used in a while, go, “Uhhh” at the request for a password, tentatively type in the throwaway word, and with relief, gain access.
For those unique passwords, it takes me a long time to form them, yes, based on something familiar and precious to me, and then to form an association with the site and the word I’m using.
I was so pissed at Heartbleed making me change a bunch of passwords. Ruined mys system 😦
Also I am with you so much on the “Your password has to be at least 50% more obnoxious!” bullcrap
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Thank for the comment. Like the idea of a throwaway password!
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I love how I think I’m going to make all my passwords the same… until different websites decide to get creative & keep people on their toes. Some want at least 10 characters instead of the usual 8 that you’ve already complied with countless times. Then they decide you need a symbol when you hadn’t accounted for one before. Then some sites decide you need to change the damn thing every month.
Needless to say, my inbox is bursting with “Password Reset” emails!
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Again, you require a password to access those mails!! It is an every growing dark vortex…Another thing man cannot live without. Some would that list also include woman…but I’m not one those guys.
I love woman. (Note singular) 😉
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Good point! But that’s the one I make sure I permanently commit to memory!
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That would definitely help!
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great blog……………….just awesome……….
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Thank you. Appreciate the visit.
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Classic. Yeah, eventually when fingerprinting is allowed and easy to customize with the computer, we won’t need passwords anymore. but until then, keep struggling with passwords.
dailyquizquestion.wordpress.com
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That’s sorta scary, using fingerprints to access all my deepest darkest websites on the Internet. The horror of something using my finger to access WordPress or Twitter AND Facebook!
Noooooo!
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You can use a fingerprint reader which stores all passwords for you.
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Reblogged this on Apps Lotus's Blog.
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Reblogged this on krrish143 and commented:
Password
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thanks for posting great i am very happy
uparekh
http://www.elala.in/
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Well as long as you’re happy, I’m happy. So is Pharrell Williams, also Happy.
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Reblogged this on oogenhand and commented:
Passwords, the eternal annoyance…
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Truer words have not been spoken…
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Great Blog…… ooooh yeah….that reminds me to change a few passwords. ….it’s that time again.
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It seems that it’s that time every time I log in somewhere. 😉
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Reblogged this on class, sass, and a little ass and commented:
This is absolutely true.
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Thanks for the mention!
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Lmao, how true! Your post gave me a good morning laugh 😀 thank you
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Glad to hear it! Thanks for the visit.
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Anytime! It’s so true! I have 2 pages of passwords 😀
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You see the problem clearly now how can we fix it? Fingerscanning sucks, retina is expensive, blood, dna, chip implants? What’s the answer?
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I’m not sure if we will ever truly know. We landed on the moon, but are unable to fully solve this little , necessary irritation of modern living.
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Had a good inward laugh reading this post. I can relate well to your frustration with password requirements on everything and struggling to remember them. My husband came up with a free solution for our family called Keypass. Have you heard of it? It is a place to store passwords on your computer and you just have to think of one incredibly awesome master password which opens the database. 🙂 It randomly generates strong passwords too, which you can copy and paste. Now I just have to remember to use and update Keypass ha ha
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A password required to solve all other password headaches. Make sense? I think.
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i too had such kind during my schoolings
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Reblogged this on Annelisep's Blog and commented:
Hilarious & well put!
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Thank you very much.
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I use an app called mSecure on my smart phone to take care of passwords, which is great until you forget the password to access that app.
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hahahaha. I feel your pain.
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Reblogged this on The Voice of Social Media.
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Reblogged this on santhoshsonu.
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İve actually used some of them lool 🙂 mainly on not so important sites
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hahaha. Got ya!
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Reblogged this on Steve Says… and commented:
This is why people need to use password safe…http://steve-says.net/2013/09/11/password-safe/
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Another thing where the use of protection is extremely important…
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Enough said. Brilliant. 😀
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Thanks. Short and sweet.
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Reblogged this on deepthoughtswithdave and commented:
Something I’m sure we can all relate to.
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Thanks for the visit.
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Reblogged this on perk2911.
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This says it all for me! I have still not recovered from changing my important passwords as a result of the “Bleeding Heart” news. I’ve been on it for nearly a week, and am still locked out of my own Outlook programme, and can’t receive or send emails,so I’m having to take my computer somewhere else for help. 😛
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That’s rough!
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That is true, indeed. What I find the worse is when you have typed such an easy password, yet you can’t remember it and say “it can’t be that simple”. Happened to me more than once.
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I feel your pain.
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I hate the response this is already in use. For me that’s come up more on figuring out a username.
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Don’t let me get started on usernames…
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Reblogged this on my blog 😀 .
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Reblogged this on Rocky road With Treats.
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My passwords not on the list 😀
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Implies it’s original then, good on you.
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Hahaha so true! I keep having to make up new passwords because I can never remember the old ones… or they are already in use
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I know what you mean.
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hahaha 🙂 I can relate to it very well and I am lazy in remembering passwords, even I have one password that rules em all sort of thing but I have to add number and signs in the end for some sites/applications I use so end up always pressing – Forgot password? button 😛
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It just become impossible to remember different ones, especially due to the copious amount of sites where a password is required.
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Reblogged this on Yep Another Blog.
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Password already exists? 🙂 Good humor and without any doubts your list is true… 🙂
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thank you
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Welcome, come visit me sometimes 😀
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Reblogged this on Technology | Digital | Information Innovations.
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Talk about a universal subject for a post. Now we’re supposed to change our passwords every three months. Who do we blame for this? Gotta reblog.
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Thanks for the comment. And the reblog.
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Reblogged this on From Dreams.
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That feeling when you can’t remember your password and you only get a few tries *gulp* and then they want to reset your password by email and you can’t remember what email address you used when you set it up *sigh*. I used to use the same password for access to social sites (learnt that was not a good idea). I now write all the different passwords in a notebook (paper) as I once couldn’t remember my laptop password and I got locked out… great post 😀
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Thank you. Why is using one password for all social sites not a good idea?
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Because it’s easier to hack, especially if they are linked.
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So funny! Really enjoyed your rant- sounded so familiar… Lol!
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Thank you.
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In a need of yet another app to store all my passwords .. Oh god fr that also .. I need to remember one more password .. Totally webbed ..
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Reblogged this on Creativity News.
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all the time i used to read smaller content which also
clear their motive, and that is also happening with this paragraph
which I am reading here.
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Pingback: Password Hell – ‘Nuff said | RANDOM TECH
Brilliant! This is so me. Im of the one password to rule them all camp (well 3 in rotation lol). I can so relate!
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Thank you.
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Hahahahaha this had me in stitches :’)! at one point I hadd “bat man and robin” as a password, which I forgot and had to reset. Passwords are one of life’s hacks.
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Fortunately for me, I am sort of a geek, so I never run out of Superhero options for my password selections.
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Reblogged this on Paucity of Perspective.
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Reblogged this on joe ijomah.
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Reblogged this on Chirikyubi.
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Spock is a person, just not a normal person.
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This is so funny! I actually have a post describing my frustrations on the same topic.
https://ohhowrandom.wordpress.com/2014/04/10/username-and-password-drama/
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Nice. I enjoyed reading
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Thank you!
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